Forgiveness as it's usually used means something like: "You have hurt me, but I won't hold an emotional grudge against you."

Such an act of forgiveness can be a great catalyst at times in healing a relationship and oneself. It is important to let go of grudges.

Though an act of forgiveness can be of crucial significance, adopting an attitude of forgiveness (continuously forgiving everyone and everything) is something to beware of.

There is a side of forgiveness which is usually ignored by those who actively practice forgiveness. It goes something like this: "I have allowed myself to be hurt by you, but I won't hold an emotional grudge against myself."

People who like to play the role of the victim conveniently ignore that ultimately the only ones who can hurt them are themselves. Placing the blame on others, making a moral judgement and taking the apparent high ground, acting deceitful and smug are things to avoid.

If the healing act of forgiveness is distorted into "You have done wrong, but since I'm so good I'll put it behind me and remind you of it only occasionally", that makes things only worse.

In this regard, forgiveness is somewhat of an obsolete concept: with an attitude of forgiveness, it is important not to continuously forgive all the time, but realize that there is nothing to forgive.

The world is what it is. It is always your choice to act or feel hurt or not.

Forgive others by realizing that the hurt is of your own making and letting go of it.

Forgive yourself by acknowledging your mistakes, letting go, and making the decision to be a different person in the future, unbound by past mistakes.

See and Love clearly.


Aeria Gloris / Random Articles / Forgiveness