On Judging

 

'Making a judgement' is an overloaded phrase with two meanings.

The first is to observe and to make an evaluation on what you have observed, in relation to what you want to do and who you want to be.
To make a decision.

The second one is to call the object of judging either 'good' or 'bad'. I prefer to call this meaning 'condemnation', for clarity.

'Condemning others' equals 'condemning yourself' out of the simple fact that 'others' equals 'yourself'.


My advice is: judge without judging.

That is, make decisions without condemnations.

Make decisions in respect to current situations, but don't close off other choices, either yours or others'.

Be aware of a 'higher' truth, a broader perspective!


Even judging someone seemingly positively from your point of view (for example: "He has good manners.") may not be to that person's liking.

Why? Because you might imply by the tone of your voice or by the nature of things said that other persons or behavior that don't fit into this category are condemned 'bad' by you.

The problem is that usually there's a big difference in how you perceive that person, how that person perceives himself and on the deeper level: who what person really is. You may perceive only an aspect, treat it as 'good' and condemn the other aspects by implying they are 'bad'.

This can be done out of simple ignorance or for manipulative purposes.
Here's an example simple and descriptive enough. It's also very ugly:

"You are a good girl. You will keep on doing what I say, you don't want to be bad, now do you? Good, of course not. Mama doesn't like bad girls. You are a good girl."

After all, people like to be liked, and if you don't exactly know what's going on you can be easily led by your nose.


If you are one of those people who think they are right opposed to everyone else (who are wrong), I suggest to give up this fixed idea and change your ways, because:

1. It's bad for your health.

2. It's bad for the health of everyone around you.

3. It's ugly and inefficient, and will get even less efficient as people start paying attention to what you are really doing.


(Of course, choice always is.)


Condemnations tend to close up on people and even if they submit to it, sooner or later they break out and the condemnations backfire on the ones who condemn.

Closing off probabilities (parts of Yourself) just pushes them out of the reach of your awareness and influence your life in form of fears.


Accept, harmonize, energize; be Yourself!
No harm can get to you when 'harm' becomes meaningless!


Pay attention - be aware!

 

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